


Who Would You Choose?

by Liadt



Category: Doctor Who (1963), The Avengers (TV)
Genre: Gen, Obscure and British Commentfest, obscure and british commentfest 2015
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-10
Updated: 2015-06-10
Packaged: 2018-04-03 19:13:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 955
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4111938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Liadt/pseuds/Liadt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mrs Peel rescues the Doctor.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Who Would You Choose?

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the 'Obscure and British' commentfest. From the prompt: Emma Peel and Doctor of your choice, Mrs Peel rescuing the Doctor by paranoidangel42.

In a laboratory, inside a converted mansion, were two large cages. They had to be large to house two men. One man was of medium height with a scruffy mop of dark hair. To keep warm in the chilly room, over his clothes he wore a tatty, fur coat, which made him look like a Yeti on its uppers. He was sat in what looked like an oversized dog bed. Scattered around him were toys, such as stickle bricks, a ball, a jack-in-a-box and an action man. The man clutched a spinning top in his hands and played with it nervously. 

The man in the other cage was tall, with neatly, sweptback blonde hair. He wore a well-cut, navy blue overcoat. He was perched on a winged-back armchair. In his lap was a copy of _The Times_ , open at the crossword page and a pencil in his hand. The smartly dressed man rose, put the pencil on a clinical looking white desk, and threw the newspaper into a waste-paper bin, to join all the other completed crosswords. The scruffy man didn’t have the luxury of a desk or bin, but he did have a large pile of _Beano_ and _Dandy_ comics. The tall man began to pace back and forth; he too was nervous. 

The reason for the men’s agitation was not the technological equipment centred around two operating tables, with thick straps on them to tie a man down, or the trays full of wickedly sharp, surgical tools. They were disturbed by the sounds of fighting, emanating from other rooms of the house, that were getting louder and nearer to the laboratory.

Suddenly, the door to the room burst open. A tall, attractive woman ran in. She moved clumsily as she was wearing white, rubber boots that were too big for her feet. She also carried a short umbrella and wore latex gloves. A thickset man, with purple tinged skin, pursued her into the room. He lunged at the woman. In return, she kicked her assailant in the stomach sending him flying into one of the operating tables. She then hit the man hard over the head with the umbrella. The man’s head shattered into pieces and after a few more blows the rest of him was reduced to shards.

The fight caused the scruffy man to jump to his feet and yelp in terror.

The woman turned to face the captives. “I agree the gloves don’t go with my cat suit and the boots complement it even less. But before I digress any further on fashion: I’m Mrs Peel, Emma Peel.”

“You must excuse Mr Smith; he’s scared by loud noises and sudden movements. I’m Professor Harrison by the way. I’m charmed to meet you.” Harrison smiled at Emma, as she strolled over.

“You’re not a nurse come to hurt us, like the bad man promised? I don’t like pain,” said Mr Smith, in a panic.

“Now, now, calm yourself. Would one of Mr Itexx’s nurses have destroyed one of his heavies?” said Harrison, in a soothing voice.

“Professor Harrison is quite correct: I have come to rescue you and I don’t think these accessories are required anymore. One touch from the purple guards results in their unfortunate affliction being passed on.” Emma removed the offending gloves and boots. “Although I’m not sure who I’m supposed to be saving. The head of the Institute of Highly Top Secret and Scientific Research said an important super-brain was missing, but there are two of you here. If only the head had shown me a photograph, I would be able to recognise for whom I was searching. I suspect any head of an academic institution that calls scientists “super-brains” didn’t get the post on merit alone.”

“Itexx said he wanted to operate on us to observe the biological differences between two people of vastly different intellects.” Harrison shuddered remembering the fate Itexx had described in detail earlier to them.

“You’re not going to leave me here and rescue the clever one are you? I don’t like it here,” said Mr Smith.

“Of course not. I shall free both of you, but the boffin comes with me. There’s something strange happening in the mines in Scotland.”

“It’s not the Uskirk mine-head again?” asked Harrison, knowledgably.

Emma didn’t reply as she unhooked a bunch of keys off a hook and undid the locks of the cages.

“Lead on, Mrs Peel,” said Harrison, cheerfully, exiting his jail.

“It’s generous of you to offer your help, but it’s Mr Smith I want.” Emma swiftly linked arms with Mr Smith before he could make a beeline for the door. 

Harrison’s mouth dropped open in shock.

“Oh, you don’t want me,” said Mr Smith, alarmed.

“Mr Smith, you don’t fool me. I’ve met so many scientists, academics, experts, boffins and obsessives, I could have picked you out from a whole room of Professors as being the best of your kind. You could say I have a nose for eccentrics. That and the _Beano_ trumps _The Times_ every time,” said Emma, breezily.

“I prefer to be called the Doctor. I use Smith when I want to go incognito,” sighed the Doctor. “Are you sure the Professor can’t sort your mining troubles out?”

“I don’t know. How are you with luminous, yellow goo, thrashing tentacles and little green men?” said Emma to Harrison.

Harrison turned somewhat green himself. “Itexx’s scaly, blue skin and purple guards were quite enough for me. I’ll stick to setting the crossword. I owe _The Times_ ’ editor a week’s worth of puzzles.”

“There you are then, Doctor, I’m afraid you’ll have to take on champagne, caviar and diabolical masterminds with me,” said Emma, towing the Doctor along to the exit.


End file.
